Finding my way again

 

Finding My Way (Again)

Sometimes the bravest thing you can do is walk away — even when you’re not entirely sure where you’re walking to.

That’s exactly where I found myself. No big plan. No safety net. Just a gut feeling telling me I couldn’t go back… and a quiet hope that one day I’d understand why.

Where did I end up next?

Well… that really was it this time. I literally never went back.

Did I wonder if I’d made the right decision? Yep — all the time. I questioned myself more than I’d like to admit. But eventually, with time and distance, I realised that I had.

Starting Again (From Home)

So what did I do next, you wonder?

I started doing a little mobile work and a little from home. I loved it at first — the freedom, the flexibility, the feeling that I was finally building something for myself. But it didn’t take long to realise that being stuck within the same four walls day after day just wasn’t for me.

I needed to get out.

I needed people.

I needed balance.

So I decided to find a small part-time job and do my nails around it.

The Pub Chapter

I applied for a job in a pub — a newly opening one — and I absolutely loved it. It was fun, busy, hard work at times, and definitely tiring… but it gave me exactly what I was missing. The socialising, the structure, getting out of the house — it was what I needed at that point in my life.

Time passed, and then I went on to have my second bubba, my little Rose.

Becoming a Mum Again

Things needed to be better this time — better for us. And I was more determined than ever.

I carried on working both jobs for as long as I could. I even took some holiday from the pub so I could finish up early and we went on a little trip away — just the three of us — before Rose arrived. And honestly, it was exactly what we needed.

Just as well, really… because a few weeks later she came early, and what a crazy hoo-ha that all was!

Choosing Wellbeing Over Burnout

So what was my next step?

I promised myself I would stay well and sane, so I went back to work when Rose was ten weeks old — but not at the pub. She didn’t sleep well, and I couldn’t risk late nights followed by no sleep on repeat.

That’s when something unexpected happened.

A Chance Connection That Changed Everything

I met a lovely lady I used to shop from. I’d started bringing the children in — Ronnie as a baby — and over time we became friends. When she told me she was opening a second shop, she offered me a job.

And I thought… yeah, why not? Let’s do it.

I loved it.

She was a mum. She was a friend. She worked around the kids. She just got it — always. I stayed with her for a few years, learning, growing, and rebuilding my confidence again.

When changes came with the shops, she encouraged me to try my own thing.

And that’s exactly what I did.

Eleven Years On

She’s now one of my very good friends. Never in my twenties did I imagine I’d meet someone at that stage of life who would become so important to me — but I did. And now, 11 years on, I honestly couldn’t imagine life without her.

Where the time has gone, I truly don’t know.

So… What Happened Next?

That’s the thing about life — it doesn’t move in straight lines. It twists, it surprises you, it challenges you, and sometimes it gives you exactly what you didn’t even know you needed.

What happened next?

That’s another chapter entirely.

The Lesson

The biggest thing I learned?

Trust yourself.

It’s okay to change direction. Walking away isn’t failure — sometimes it’s growth. You don’t need the whole plan, just the courage to take the next step.

Every choice led me here.

And I wouldn’t change a thing.